Matt Reagan teaches the first week of our new series.

The Gap Week 1 from the Post - Southeast Christian on Vimeo.

Asking for accountability can be a nerve-racking process. It's kind of like asking someone on a date for the first time (or so I've heard...). But if you weigh the benefits to the initial feeling of potential awkwardness, it's worth the risk. Like we said before, if you talk to anyone with good accountability in their life, they will tell you that it's been life changing. 

What to look for in accountability

If you're wondering what you should look for in accountability, here's some practical advice. Accountability needs to be of the same sex. Because of the nature of confession, this is natural. You should also look for a godly man/woman that you enjoy spending time with, and that you respect and trust. We need to be sharpened by those that are in the same stage of life as us, but also by those that may be a few steps ahead of us. Accountability should not come from people that are impressed by you. To expect those who greatly look up to you to hold you accountable would be like your boss asking you why you would fire him.

What do we talk about?

Often time, I've walked into accountability thinking, "We don't need a plan. I'll just talk about life and how I've felt lately. That will paint a picture of what I'm struggling with enough for the other person to know what to ask me." But this has RARELY ever worked for me. True accountability happened when I was willing to write down the questions I know I needed asked, and hand them to the other person. These can be questions like:

· Has Christ been alive in you this week?
· Did you share your faith this week?
· Have you been in an inappropriate position with the opposite sex?
· Have you treated you finances as a servant or as a god?
· Have you spent adequate time in prayer and study?
· What sin is still in the dark in your life that you need to confess?
· Is there anything you haven’t been surrendering to God?
· Have you dwelt on unwholesome thoughts?
· How have you dealt with the sin you confessed last week?
· Have you kept pure physically, visually, and in your thoughts?
· Have you lied about anything?

For more resources, questions, and information, check out this blog.

Last week, we wrapped up our Rethink series. As we went through that series, a common theme kept resonating in my own life: accountability. Try as I may, I need other people in my life pushing me towards forgiveness, trust, commitment...all those things we emphasized in this series. And our new series, "the Gap", won't be any different. In the challenge to reconcile what we believe with who we are, there is still a need to have at least one person asking us the difficult questions.

If you're confused about exactly what accountability is supposed to look like, you aren't alone. And it can look completely opposite from one person to the next. Some people meet in groups, others feel more comfortable having an individual. Some are more structured, others are more relaxed. 

Anyone who has had good accountability in their life can tell you that it's life changing. When we look at the lives of anyone in the Bible (or even modern day) that accomplished anything of great significance, one thing is common. They had someone there encouraging them and sharpening them the whole way. Adam had Eve, Moses had Aaron, David had Jonathan, Paul had Silas, Timothy had Titus…. even Jesus himself had a group of twelve walking beside Him, with an inner three (check out Matthew 17 for an example).

Accountability is NOT:

· Drums & Sports – accountability is not an attempt for men to increase their testosterone by hiking into the wild to beat drums naked around a fire. Nor is it a time to sit around and talk about sports for 2 hours.

· Makeup & Gossip – likewise, accountability is not painting nails and doing each other's makeup while sitting around sharing the latest celebrity news and flipping through magazines.

· Opposite Sex Bashing – it's not a time to bash the male/female race or the person you are in a relationship with.

· Recovery Group - the intent is to tackle and overcome all sin and circumstances, not just a weekly meeting focused on one specific issue

· Bible Study – though the Word should be the central focus, it is not the only one

· Whining Session – leave the economy, church, pastor, government, boss, etc. complaining sessions at home

· Non-Commitment – if you are looking for a relationship or group where you can show up whenever you feel like it or have nothing better to do, this is not it

What IS accountability?

· Intentional – focused and purposeful with a mission in mind

· Inviting – an inviting environment is essential for confession and growth. Comfort is a must--so avoid environments where you'll get distracted

· Honesty & Confession – without these, there is no accountability (James 5:16)

· Praying Together

· Challenging & Rebuke – we are to take our sin and the sins of others seriously and attack them head on. This is where the sharpening happens (James 5:19-20, Galatians 6:1)

· Loving & Non-Judging – just because we are to challenge and rebuke each other does not mean we are to judge (Romans 12:10)

· Encouragement – “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”  1 Thessalonians 5:11

· Carrying each other’s burdens – “Carry each others burdens, and in this way you fulfill the law of Christ.”  Galatians 6:2

· Sharing Life Together

Rethink Week #4 from the Post - Southeast Christian on Vimeo.

Ben teaches "Rethink the Post".

You can buy tickets ANY Tuesday night at the Post before November 4th. Please...invite your friends!!!